Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Today was the first day of school. Haizzz... Must start all over again. But then trying to adapt to a new environment is certainly what one needs to go through in life and I need to be grateful to God for blessing me so much in my life. Financial accounting is boring and I even resort to going online during lessons to just chat. Haaa, but then really boring man. But it was ok la. At least I could understand it. Classes end at 1145.
Then after that met up with "Hey how is your day" again. We went Mind Cafe for lunch and then played many of the games there. Quite fun. Then we were talking a bit about the issue that I really have to decide on. Making a decision this week is really very sian. But then this is the time limit that I give myself. Either go for it with all my heart or give up. But then it is really a tough one. I am at a lost.
Suddenly I just feel so PISSED with just everything. I am pissed with SOME people who is ridiculous and also with my own laptop. It is so slow, then hung a few times just now. I think everything just pissed me off at this point of time. I do not know why I am so pissed. Probably I am just troubled and confused. Or perhaps I am not able to overcome the hurt.Or perhaps I had not been feeling good about myself and things happening around me. Or perhaps I am sick of putting up an act. Or maybe it is due to the inability of me to express my thoughts and how I feel. Dun know. Just EVERYTHING. Haizzzz.....
I dun want to feel. I dun want to think. Sometimes I just hope to be like a wooden block that is just straight and without feelings. Will not suffer pain and will always be the same no matter what. Hope that I can recarnate to be one. Haizzz....I dun know what I am talking liao. Think I should stop here or me myself will be the ridiculous one.
Then after that met up with "Hey how is your day" again. We went Mind Cafe for lunch and then played many of the games there. Quite fun. Then we were talking a bit about the issue that I really have to decide on. Making a decision this week is really very sian. But then this is the time limit that I give myself. Either go for it with all my heart or give up. But then it is really a tough one. I am at a lost.
Suddenly I just feel so PISSED with just everything. I am pissed with SOME people who is ridiculous and also with my own laptop. It is so slow, then hung a few times just now. I think everything just pissed me off at this point of time. I do not know why I am so pissed. Probably I am just troubled and confused. Or perhaps I am not able to overcome the hurt.Or perhaps I had not been feeling good about myself and things happening around me. Or perhaps I am sick of putting up an act. Or maybe it is due to the inability of me to express my thoughts and how I feel. Dun know. Just EVERYTHING. Haizzzz.....
I dun want to feel. I dun want to think. Sometimes I just hope to be like a wooden block that is just straight and without feelings. Will not suffer pain and will always be the same no matter what. Hope that I can recarnate to be one. Haizzz....I dun know what I am talking liao. Think I should stop here or me myself will be the ridiculous one.
